Living A Valued Based Life With Intention

WE LOVE JESS LIVELY

Does everyone know Jess Lively? She’s a businesswoman, podcast host, and believes in living life with value-based intentions. I’ve been listening to her podcast, The Lively Show, for about a year now. I can’t even remember how I found it, but I feel like she’s filling the gap that was left when The Oprah Show went off the air. Actually, I kind of feel like she’s my own Oprah because she’s a peer who interviews entrepreneurs and authors who I admire – and in podcast form, I’m able to listen while I work. Her podcast stands out because she puts in the work: she chooses guests her audience wants to hear from, she does her research, and she edits it with her audience in mind – keeping it concise and informative. She does a great job of responding to blog comments, tweets, and Instagram messages! With so much social media these days I feel like it’s almost impossible to keep up so, when a person (or a company) does, it really means a lot. To go back to Oprah…in her farewell show she said, “Everyone wants to feel valued.” We couldn’t agree more and we know Jess gets that 100%.

LIFE WITH INTENTION ONLINE

In September I signed up for one of her free webinars explaining her class “Life With Intention Online.” I went into it thinking, “Okay, this seems cool, but do I really need a workshop to figure out what I value?” Halfway through the webinar I remember thinking, “YES!! I need this. I need to take this class RIGHT NOW!! It’s the perfect time in my life and I’m ready to reevaluate and take on this life of mine…now, hopefully, she isn’t going to charge a million dollars.” At the end of the webinar she revealed the price with added incentives to sign up early. It didn’t feel like she was trying to pressure anyone into doing this. She kept saying, “Ask your intuition…if you feel like this is something you want to do, then join us! If not, then don’t.” I think this is the key to much of her expertise. She is just nice. Not conniving. So before I even asked my intuition, it yelled to me, “Yes, Jaclyn, do this!”

I joined!!! The course is set up in four modules. It lasted the entire month of October (my favorite month) with a new module released each week. Each module is comprised of a series of videos, worksheets, and a live video coaching call. The videos are short, bite-sized, easy to digest. We are talking under 3 minutes each. This is my favorite part of the course. Jess (again) has put in the work. She respects the time of her clients and makes it as easy as possible to understand. The worksheets are the perfect way to connect with the information and not just watch it. (Also, I love a worksheet.) One night – roughly each week – Jess holds a live video coaching call. For me, these coaching calls are what took this workshop from your standard e-course to a personal community of people who care. You could submit questions ahead of time or ask them live on the call. The beauty to this was that Jess didn’t rush through. It wasn’t about getting a sound bite or regurgitating her message. It was about the individual…really talking to them - hearing their concerns, their struggle, and figuring out how to help them get through it. By the end of each call you feel connected to these people. You want the best for them and you feel like they know more about you than even your co-workers do. What sets Jess apart is this…she can phrase her questions or her suggestions in a way that doesn’t sound judgy or “let me tell you how to live your life”. She makes the person she’s talking to feel comfortable. You know she’s on your side. And maybe it’s because she’s removed from the situation, but it lets the person see another interpretation of the situation without getting defensive. I feel like everyone needs someone in their life like this. Thankfully, one of my best friends has a PhD in psychology so she is my go-to girl when I need a fresh perspective, but I can now say that Jess has also helped me see certain things in a different way.

The best way for me to get the most out of something is to have me pay for it. In the same way, I seem to only go to the gym when I pay for a class, I was determined to get the most out of this class since I paid the money to be here. I asked a question on every conference call. Even when I thought, “I totally get this!”, there would be something I learned from talking with Jess. Even just listening to her talk through other people’s questions was extremely helpful.

MY TWO LIGHT BULB MOMENTS

The modules are set up in such a way that at the end of each one you feel rejuvenated and are excited for the next week. Without giving it all away, I wanted to share two of the many light bulb moments I had during the workshop.

In Module 2 you actually write down your values. Writing down your values – okay that’s easy. What matters to me most in life? First, let me say – there’s so much to gain by actually writing down your values vs. just thinking you know what they are. And my first attempt might be the worst values ever written. Jess says they should feel like a cozy sweater. Here’s my first shot at my values concerning my possessions: “To put effort into both my physical appearance and the appearance of my home so that I feel proud.” Oh my goodness – just reading that stresses me out. I knew I could do better but wasn’t sure how, so when there was a gap in questions, I thought, “Alight, I’ll ask one.” Jess got to the root of my values, we chuckled about what I wrote down, and figured out the exact words that resonated with me. It wasn’t like, “Here’s what you should do later.” We took 10 minutes and did it right there – together!!   Here are my new possession values: “Livable, Comfortable, Put together!” Just reading them puts a smile on my face!! She talked about how you had to find the right values for yourself. For some people “put together” might not feel good but, for me, I love it!!!

Then came Module 3. I had rewritten all my values in the different categories, but was still having some issues with my career values. And that’s when Jess blew my mind and made this entire workshop worth every penny. I told her our situation and she simply said, “You need to ask yourself why you want a career.” The question almost made me vomit!! I think my stomach flipped over. And then she said, “Jaclyn, listen, I’m not saying you can’t have a career – you can! But WHY do you want one?” I had never thought about this. Of course, I want a career…it is who I am. It’s why I decided to stay home, be a full-time mom, and raise our daughter…then immediately started my company, Love Jac. But WHY?!?! I never stopped and asked myself that. I’ve just been going, going, going! That next week I went to my favorite coffee shop and wrote myself a letter (Jess’ suggestion). Oh man, did that feel good! My husband asked to read it, so I printed it out and let him look into my soul. Talk about clarity. Talk about redefining success. So what was “To connect with my community through writing, teaching, and workshops. And To set an example of bringing more fun to life through sending cards, celebrating friendships, and memory keeping.” quickly became “Share Creativity.” I want to be creative and share it with others - from my cards, to teaching Artists & Crafts, to scrapbooking!! It’s all about being creative and sharing it with the world!! In my letter there is also a section about earning money myself and providing for my family, which is the logistical side that I will continue to work on each day. But the values – the most important part – is the creativity and sharing it. Thank you, Jess!! 

In Module 4 we put it all to work. Using her worksheets I was able to clearly set up a plan to continue to reach my values!! I think this will be my go-to exercise to work through any difficult situation. If you know me, you know I love a plan!

LIVING WITH INTENTION

I think it’s clear to say I highly recommend this course. Chad has said he notices a real difference in me. I am less stressed and get less worked up. Whenever I am feeling overwhelmed I go back to those values. On that same note, when I’m not happy it’s extremely clear now why. I’ll give you one more example. I have two sets of Values for my Personal Habits: #1 to be AWARE & SMART and then #2 to INDULGE & RECHARGE!! Recently when my daughter was home sick from school for several consecutive days, not only was I stuck in an apartment that wasn’t currently livable, comfortable, or put together, but I wasn’t getting any time to indulge or recharge. After hitting a low, my husband suggested he go into work late the next day so I could go to the coffee shop for an hour and a half! I sat there alone in the quiet sipping my café mocha and getting things checked off my to-do list. I was 100% indulging and when I came back home I was completely recharged!! That hour break is the reason I made it through the next couple sick days!! A huge thank you to Chad – the best husband ever – and his boss for understanding family life!

I wanted to share this with you all since that is part of my values, and also because I want to publicly say thank you to Jess – for changing my outlook on life. I completely believe that the way to be happy is to be happy now. Her workshop has given me the tools to know what makes me happy, what makes me feel successful. If any of this seems to be your thing, definitely check out the workshop – or as Jess would say, “Ask your intuition.” She is currently enrolling for the winter session.  If you want get an idea of Jess’ work, then you should 100% listen to her podcast. My favorite episodes are Brooke Castillo, Courtney Carver, Elizabeth Gilbert, Gabrielle Blair, Joy Cho and, of course, Tina Roth-Eisenberg. I hope you enjoy them!!